So I did get the stick the next day but I was not ready to face it. I hid it in the bathroom at the back of the bottom draw under the QTips.

Last night I am in bed and Bug (Richard) is in the bathroom and he needs a QTIP!!!

Shit! I freeze in bed as I here him opening the draws and rummaging around in each of them.

Then I hear 'Mini..why have you got a pregnancy test' and he comes straight into the room. I cannot believe he found it!! I mean I never want to be secretive from him or deceitful but I would like to sit down and have a chat about it first. Even Bridget Jones managed this bit better than me.

I just said the truth..that my period has still not come and I am a bit worried.

Bug seems fine and falls straight to sleep! I lie there for hours thinking uh oh no no no.

I realise that this makes me sound like some irresponsible brat. Well, I am too old to be a brat but having just moved here I am trying to get my freelance career off the ground. Now if I get pregnant I do ruin not only my career but our income. I love my work in innovation and design and it is going to be hard to find that niche as Calgary is definately not the heart of Canada's innovation and design industry.

I have got friends who have had the hell of IVF rounds before their babies have come and some still have not been lucky, sadly some never will. I guess if I was to be suddenly, unexpectedtly pregnant I would feel a bit guilty and well yes, irresponsible. However, we have a solid relationship so whatever the outcome is it will be fine.